SEÑOR(A) TANGO

Since Tango is synonymous with Buenos Aires, it seems imperative that I actually see some, especially now that I own my very own Carlos Gardel doll,
 

but contrary to what the guidebooks would have you believe, there are NOT passionate couples tangoing on every block. In fact, in all my time here and in Uruguay, I have only seen one couple dancing in a gazebo in a city park to tunes played on an old fashioned record player. That was pretty sweet to witness. Granted, I have not been hanging about too many tourists spots besides The Pink House and the widest street in the world and if you attempted to tango there, then you would BE the "tourist spot" right on the road (and probably pink, at that).
Still, one can't leave Buenos Aires without having experinced the tango, so Rachael and I make a date to see the BIG DADDY Tango show of them all :SEÑOR TANGO

But first we take a bus ride out to La Boca, one of the city's barrios where tango is purported to have been born. La Boca is situated at the mouth of Rio Riachuelo and was originally settled by fisherman from Italy and Spain. It is said that the tango dance evolved in the port's brothels as a seductive, sensuous and competitive prelude among the many men vying for the favors of the few women. I have also heard it said that the dance was first performed between men at the brothels awaiting their turn with the prostitutes. Caminito is the main street and the most famous area in La Boca and has been immortalized in tango lyrics and is considered an important place in the history of tango. It is also the colorful street you see in all the photographs of Buenos Aires and the header for this blog so I am a little disappointed when we first arrive at how dull it looks in real life.

Then I realize I have the black and white setting selected on my camera. It REALLY looks like this:

The houses are painted with left over boat paint from the port, which I think is a great way to recycle and it makes your neighborhood a tourist attraction too, so you can make a little extra revenue while saving cash on house paint. Brilliant in more ways than one!

We wander up and down El Camanito and I let Carlos Gardel visit his old haunts and have a smoke,

and then we walk a little farther into the neighborhood to try and find a non-tourist cafe. This is a bad idea. If you actually live in La Boca it is probably perfectly safe to walk around, but if you are a tourist you should probably just suck it up and pay a bit more for your meal and figure you are contributing to the paint fund. This area is definitely sketchy.

At one point, while we are standing on a corner debating which way to go an old man who is crossing the street warns us not to "turn down that street" and we hear a kid in the schoolyard complaining that he doesn't "want to rob!" There are shady characters leaning in doorways all the way up and down the streets and walking past them is like walking down the Senior hall in high school when you are a Freshman.
We manage to find a cafe and not get mugged and we do meet a nice dog who is hoping for a doggie bag and I would very much like to take him with me when we leave, as he has a nice set of big teeth that might be useful in this neighborhood.

Alas, he moves on and we hop a bus and get ready to spend an evening at Señor Tango.

GARDELIAN ANGEL ON MY SHOULDER

They say that if you've been to Buenos Aires and you haven't seen Señor Tango, then you haven't been to Buenos Aires. I am still trying to figure out how that works, some kind of koan I guess, but let it be said that if you take note of all the celebrity photos strewn around the enormous walls of the palace that houses Señor Tango (hardly the traditional smokey tango salon) then it appears that anyone who's anyone has been to both Buenos Aires and Señor Tango's.

Señor Tango is not really authentic tango. More it's Las Vegas meets Lawrence Welk at the Cirque de Soleil and everyone takes steroids and does tango, tango. This tango salon has 1500 seats, two tiers of balconies, live horses, a pair of aging twins who switch into a number of equally bad wigs and a smoke machine on overdrive. That said, Rachael and I have a wonderful, if irreverent, time.

The dancers really are exquisite, the tango steps complex and beautifully executed, the staging weird but compelling and at least some of the music authentic tango. Sadly my Carlos Gardel doll is disgusted and scowls horribly during the finale number, "Don't cry for me Argentina" (tango?)

CARLOS IS APPALLED AT WHAT THEY HAVE DONE TO HIS BELOVED TANGO!

and Rachael and I weep in laughter and astonishment when an Argentinian flag even larger than the one at the Pink House drops out of the ceiling and the tango dancers circle round and make pious tango faces.

RACHAEL IS STUNNED AT THE ANTICS OF SEÑOR TANGO

So...I've seen some tango and it really is moving and passionate and dynamic and even though Rachael's downstairs neighbor keeps telling me about her tango instructor friend who would be willing to teach me, I still can barely WALK in high heels and I certainly can't make that haughty tango face, so I am not so sure that tango is for me...

WARNING! TANGO LESSON IN PROGRESS

What do you think?

Well, I have to go pay a visit to Rachael's chiropractor before I get on my plane ride home so,
Ciao for now,
J




La Boca

View Larger Map